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an idealist & optimist obsessed with rain, currently trying to focus on studies (UN menanti: April!), yet still known as someone who can't talk & laugh silently and infrequently :) one more. currently in love ♥

1.23.2011

Alil ♥

aaaaaaaaku kangen alif!


jujur aja aku bnr2 kangen sm gojekannya dia d rmh, sesi ngejam gak jelas kita (dimana aku asal ngebass atau main harmoni sementara dia bikin melodi aneh2), waktu aku bantuin dia latian debat di rmh, waktu kita bikin lagu2 aneh di perjalanan (Lif msh inget yang "rain rain go away youre making me wanna pee" atau apa itu gak? HAHAHAHA) curhatannya (yg kebanyakan ttg mb aya), ejekannya dia ttg curhatanku, gimana dia bantuin aku bljr fisika.
aku akuin, ini semua krn dia putus sm mb aya. tp gak terus aku benci mb aya, atau malah benci ibuku ataupun benci dia.


kinda sounds stupid, but actually i kinda hate myself.


selama ini aku emang kangen sm dia (through the whole breakup i mean), tp aku bs ngelakuin apa buat bikin dia jd normal lg? jujur aku gak ngapa2in. aku malah nyentakin dia, malah sebel sm sikapnya dia. pdhl aslinya normal juga kan sikapnya kayak gini? i mean he just broke up with his girlfriend, i wasn't expecting this problem to be done in two or three days. but still. kalo dipikir2 emang agak gak normal juga kan sampe skg ini dia msh mutungan gitu?


masa pas kmrn ini dia bentakin ibuku!


jd itu pas stengah enaman gitu, pas hari sabtu. tiap selasa kamis sabtu alif emang ada PM, jd dia selalu dibangunin lbh awal sm ibuku. tp pas kmrn ini dia bentakin ibuku waktu ibuku tny, "udah dibangunin kok gak bangun2 toh mas?", alif jawabnya "IT'S MY LIFE MUM!". hbs itu mbahku juga bilang "kalo dibangunin tuh lgsg bangun lif" trs dia bilang "MBAH GAK USAH IKUT CAMPUR". sampe bawa2 kalo dia gak atheis lagi! aku lg nyiapin buku itu lgsg shock tuh lho, sama sekali gak nyangka kalo alif bakal meledak besar2an kayak kmrn.


waktu itu aku bnr2 pengen bantu dia, tp kalo diliat dr segi apapun yg salah jg alif kan? mungkin kalo diliat dr prespektifnya alif enggak. waktu itu aku ngutuk2in setan yg udah bikin kakakku yg baik, iseng, perhatian, dan terbuka itu jd gini. walopun gitu di kamar mandi aku nangis hahahaha - - njijiki yak? wkwk


tp skg ini kalo dipikir2 lg, mungkin aja setannya itu aku. mungkin aja setannya keluargaku (bukan maksud durhaka sm ortu tp cuman ngeliat scr objektif), mungkin aja setannya itu temen2nya alif. mungkin karena kita dia jd kayak gitu. entah itu krn kita kurang ngasih perhatian, atau kurang bantuin dia nge-cope breakupnya, atau malah karena selama ini dia ngerasa kurang dianggep. it's just a guess, so i don't really know which is which.


kasian sih sama dianya. sengsara juga kan dia sendirian trs di rumah, ngurung diri di kamar tanpa ada yg merhatiin. tp mungkin juga dia malah ngerasa enak bs sendirian. aaaaambohlah.


seandainya alif msh 'normal', aku yakin dia bakal ketawa ngakak kalo tau taun ini duluan USEK daripada UNnya. aku yakin dia bakal ngatain kucingku "Wooooo dasar bos gondes" kalo tau Bodrex lg banyak luka soalnya keseringan gelut & sok2an jagoan sama kucing kampung lain. aku yakin dia bakal ngejekin aku & ngasih aku nasihat kalo aku cerita tentang cowok yg aku suka skg makin jauhin aku (shutup you fuckin readers!). aku yakin dia bakalan ngajak aku ngelembur tiap malem, maksain aku nemenin & bantuin dia latian debat (februari dia ke jakarta, mau maju NSDC sebagai wakil Yogyakarta. doain dia yak!). aku yakin dia bakal nimpuk aku tiap aku ngatain dia 'GAY HAHAHAHA' kalo dia pulang hbs latian debat sm Mas Hanif. kalo skg ini dia msh sm mb aya, aku yakin tanggal tiga kmrn alif bakalan brag di dpnku kalo dia udah 9 bulan sm dia.


aku kangen bgt sm kamu lif :( please get well soon!


i miss our old times, bro :')

1.14.2011

Jon McLaughlin-So Close

ini lagu BAGUS BANGET SUMPAH. jd soundtracknya film Enchanted yg emang udah agak lama hehehe tp aku msh suka nonton (ketahuan nontonnya film anak kecil wkwk) tp aku nonton krn suka sm lagunya yg pas bagian waltz terakhir itu hehe. judulnya So Close :) bagus banget beneran hehe. nih baca2 aja dulu liriknya biar meyakinkan wkwk:


You're in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by 
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you're beside me and look how far we've come
So far we are so close 

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We're so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let's go on dreaming for we know we are
So close 
So close
And still so far :)

Mocca-Me and My Boyfriend

I've got a boyfriend now
He's my dearest pal
He'll always catch me when I fall
He's always there when I call

I've got a boyfriend now
He always talks so loud
Even in a crowded house
He always shows what he got

I share my dreams and all my stories
I don't think I need my diary
If you're teasing me, don't you worry?
I will keep you in my memories

When my boyfriend smiles
The world seems all mine
And all the days seems truly fine
Make me reach up for the sky

Me & my boyfriend now
We're moving so slow
If you really want to know
Come on and join the show!

I share my dreams and all my stories
I don't think I need my diary
If you're teasing me, don't you worry?
I will keep you in my memories

When I'm blue, feel so lonely
No one sits here right beside me
I'm gonna call you just to hurry
Come and see me
It's so scary and I need you desperately

I share my dreams and all my stories
I don't think I need my diary
If you're teasing me, don't you worry?
I will keep you in my memories

I share my dreams and all my stories
I don't think I need my diary
If you're teasing me, don't you worry?
I will keep you in my memories ♥